For those who wondered, I answered. ❤
FOR THOSE WHO WONDERED, I ANSWERED…
Soooo, I wrote a book!
My book has officially been published and as of now, you can find it on Amazon! This book traces the last 10-14 years of my life. Marked by deep pain, depression, trauma, and an eating disorder, yet woven through every single moment is the golden thread of God’s presence. He was with me. Always. Faithful …
Thanks a Latte Thoughts
I am sitting at Thanks a Latte this afternoon writing a book that will be published someday. Eight years ago, I was sitting here at this Thanks a Latte writing. During that time, I was only beginning to walk through depression. I self-harmed, I was in and out of school, and I traveled to Duke …
Eating Disorder Awareness Week – My Story
It was 2014 and I had been hospitalized for depression not an eating disorder. Yet the doctors made it very clear to me that if I wasn't eating the hospital food, I had an eating disorder. My question is, who likes the hospital food? My roommate and I came up with a plan that anytime a nurse came into our room I would take out my goldfish crackers that my mom brought me and I would snack on those. At the time, I had no relationship with any eating disorder. And not in a million years did I ever think I would struggle with one. The doctors were simply wrong in that moment but this was my first introduction to someone assuming I had an eating disorder based upon my appearance.
29 and So Much Life Left To Live.
i remember laying in my bed at 18 staring at balloons in my room simply dreading my 19th birthday. when i was 19, i was scared to turn 20. i wanted to escape. as birthdays continued the theme continued. but i celebrated. with family, with balloons, with gifts, with dinners, with smiles. on the outside …
Things to Live For.. and Stay For
THINGS TO LIVE FOR. i am learning my “why” is an anchor and can’t be moved within any storm. but there are little things that keep me going. little things to live for and stay for too. glimpses of joy. this year almost knocked me out but thank God for the people in my life …
Don’t Hold Onto The How…Just Go Skydiving.
recently i got caught up in a whirlwind that is “next steps”. finding myself overwhelmed, the Father whispered “holding onto the ‘how’ is only hurting you. release it to Me.” a few years ago before making the decision to come to Redding, i was in the same place. i remember sitting in a coffee shop when i found myself intimidated by what was ahead. as i wrestled with some of what the Lord was showing me about my future, i let the question of “how?” become bigger and bolder than His beautiful promises and purpose for my life. instead of having confidence in Him, i tried calculating how everything would work. in that moment, the Lord took me back to the first time i went skydiving. i was thinking about the excitement that i had until i realized exactly what i was going to be doing... falling out of the sky intentionally. there were so many doubts and fears coming up. within seconds my mind was clinging to the worst case scenario.
This Is Just Your Reminder That It Doesn’t Have To End ;
this song came on when i was in the car this morning. my mind went to all the times i’ve been in this place … feeling hidden, forgotten, hopeless, broken, the reality of innocence stolen. all the lyrics resonated. feeling so alone simply just wanting the ache and pain to end. feeling completely misunderstood by the world and wanting God to show up. to be seen and safe. to be understood. to not have to defend myself. thank God for the reality of our God being Emmanuel. thank God for Jehovah Rapha. thank God for the God who sees and knows and wants to be close. for the One who fights for me and with me and has never left me. be encouraged tonight. if you’re in that place… as i write from a similar place. knowing hope and knowing pain. let this be your reminder that Emmanuel is close. so very close. hand in hand He wants to be. to rescue. to save. he is Savior after all.
annie snyder 